Friday, May 10, 2013

My Top Ten Parenting Tips

Having 8 kids you learn a few things along the way!  One of the biggest is that you better get ahead of the kids so you can live life vs playing the chase game every minute of the day!  It doesn't always go smooth but you can be in control vs kids being in control.

Some of these I have blogged on before so I will attach the link if you want to know more.  You are invaluable to your child!  God saw that YOU were the perfect parent for YOUR child.  He gave you all you need to raise these kids.  Be encouraged that what you do MATTERS!  We are raising the next generation of lawyers, doctors, teachers, CEO's, politicians, accountants, chefs, pilots, utility workers, maintenance workers, counselors, pastors, moms and dads!  As Tim Kimmel says,
"Truly great people seldom simply happen, they are carefully groomed for the moment long before they get there!" 

So, here you go MOMS! 

  1. Couch Time - Mom and dad need to be one in parenting and this is one way we achieve this as a couple.  IF you are a single parent I bet you still need Couch Time to gather your thoughts, look to the Father, and just relax a moment before you engage in these precious humans called KIDS!
  2. Tools, Toys, and Treasures - Teaching these to our children when they were young meant we could go other places and even if the home wasn't baby proof/toddler proof we could have adult conversations.  It's training your kids with what is allowed and what isn't before you are in the situation.  We practiced in our home so when we were out with one word they knew what was appropriate to play with and what was not.  
  3. Louder is NOT Better - The louder you get in your disciplining the LESS they listen!  When you realizing you are raising your voice...are your kids doing what you ask?  Probably not!  My kids tend to look at me like I am some crazy woman.  Which actually in that moment I am!  When I get control and lower my voice and talk with control...they listen!  We tend to let the frustration of the moment control us vs the teaching opportunity that we have been given.  Next time you want to get loud...lower your voice and watch what happens! 
  4. Let Them Wonder - We have found that sometimes in disciplining our kids that when we tell them to wait in their room or wait for when dad comes home or I'll be there in 10 minutes....we will find a repentant child.  Amazing what the fear of the unknown can do.  Instead of them being defensive about their actions they tend to move to repentance.  Can you think of a better parenting strategy than letting God grab their heart?  This doesn't always happen as sometimes we are just as hard headed as can be.  I think often we are too quick to jump in as parents with a harsh word or scolding.  Maybe calmly telling them go to your room and I will be there soon to talk to you....give God a few minutes to work on their hearts.  Sometimes they need you to be the hard hand...but sometimes they need us to let God work first! 
  5. Interrupt Rule - Ever been on the phone or talking with someone and you have a child or two or three begging for your attention?  Time to teach the interrupt rule!  Your gonna love this!
  6. Eat Your Age Got picky eaters?  All kids have their thing but more often than not we at least have a way our kids will try lots of foods they would normally be rejected. We also learned a little trick that keeps them from announcing to the entire table of kids that a certain food might need to be avoided:)  You are NOT allowed to say I Do Not Like This!  OR You will get to eat the helping of the person next to you.  Stopped that fiasco in seconds!
  7. Train to the Positive Not Just the Negative - If you discover you are constantly disciplining one issue over and over again...start looking for a positive to point them too.  Maybe they aren't grasping what they SHOULD be doing.  WE have found when we can praise what they do that is right...they long to DO IT AGAIN. 
  8. Kids are Gonna Cry Now or Later...Teach Them Now - This is such a true statement!  Kids are gonna cry at 5 or they will cry at 25!  Parents...we have a job to do and we need to train today and not put it off for tomorrow.  You think your 3 or 5 year old is hard to train?  Wait until they are 13 or 15.  Do the hard thing will be glad you did. 
  9. The Days are Long but the Years Are Short - This phrase says it all!  What you do as moms is so worth the chaos you live in now!  Hang in there because changing a gazillion diapers, being spit on all day long, solving all those sibling fights and helping with will actually miss one day. 
  10. Training is Ongoing - (This is discipline, disciple, training....THAT is ongoing!) We set ourselves up for frustration when we think we only have to teach it to them once. 

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