I love how God can continue to be so real to me in new ways I never saw! Sometimes those new ways of seeing Him can happen in a second and sometimes it simmers and takes time to fully grasp its full meaning. The Sovereignty of God is one of those things that has had to simmer for me.
I haven't questioned His Sovereignty but I don't think I was really fully grasping it. Of course I laugh as I say that...can we really ever fully understand Him?! It's like a child who thinks they've got things all figured out and you as a parent snicker knowing more will be revealed as they age and grow. They are confident they know, but we know they barely grasp the reality of what they think. So our Heavenly Father must either snicker at our naivety, or maybe He is even saddened at our assurance and over confidence. Don't you see it in your kids sometimes? Sometimes its funny as you know they will grow and learn. Other times it is heartbreaking as you see, they don't see.
As a parent, we take on so much of that like we have control or we have the power. We might hold ourselves responsible for something that really we have no power to change. We can influence so we do have that power. But God...GOD is the Sovereign One. If you had asked me about His Sovereignty I would have said YES...He is Sovereign. But I don't think until today I fully comprehended what His Sovereignty looked like from my angle.
Doing a study on "The 5 Aspects of Biblical Womanhood" (which I HIGHLY recommend for all women!) She explained Sovereignty in a way I had never seen it. God puts the chess board and pieces before us, we can move any way we want on the board. We have freedom, with limits. Yes, He is so wise and great that whatever His creatures do, He still brings all moves to fulfill His purpose. Oh I can make some not so smart moves. (freewill) But my freewill does not mean I have lost my ability to serve Him. Every move has a consequence. But He can work, all my moves, according to His purposes. Romans 8:28
So many times as a Christian I can become immobile because of fear if it is a right decision or not. So I wait, worry, fear, question. Is that what God wants me to do? No way! I have freedom to move and choose. God will work all things to his glory. There isn't just ONE move to be done. At the same time, my moves do matter. But they shouldn't be crippling me into indecisiveness. I wonder how many times the enemy tries to cripple us? I know for me...a lot! Part of my personality is indecisiveness. Something I have or should I say still learning to take control so I don't sit doing nothing. We all have something that God brings in control and the enemy loves to push OUT of control. Do we let him? He has no power over me and yet sometimes I allow him to have more power. Usually happens when I put my eyes on me or my circumstances and off the Lord.
I feel like I have been in a state of STUCK for awhile. Questioning every decision. Wondering if I should have, could have game. Maybe its just this stage of life. Kids are grown, I see so many ways I could have done it better. I find I am questioning everything. I know my downfalls. I know where I could have, should have, been better. The enemy whispers, see...Yep, you should have! Yet my Savior says, Follow Me, I will show you...it wasn't all about YOU! Who told you that?! I am Sovereign. Your moves do not thwart my plan. (Thank the Lord!)
No more...no more Satan! It's time for me to stop allowing the questioning to keep me immobile! It's time to get my eyes firmly back upon my Father! I'm ready for Chess (event though I have no idea how to play) but luckily my Father has a skill unmatched by anyone. Even the enemy! I have lots of moves behind me, but I have lots of moves still ahead of me. It's time to keep making moves and stop feeling frozen because I'm fearful or believing I don't have much to offer.
Who are you believing? The whispers of the enemy or the Sovereignty of your Father?
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