There are no words to describe the chaotic ways of a family of 10. And especially as my family gets older. I always thought when other moms told me to just wait until they get older I would be more busy, I thought they were insane. (Just forgetting the busy life of a mom with little ones.) But now that I am at this stage of parenting (the teenagers), I definitely believe they were right!
That doesn't mean that mom's with younger ones aren't busy, because YOU ARE! Oh, you definitely are! It is you and all you!
At this stage though our range of chaos goes well beyond the walls of our home! Basically...out of mom's reach! There is something to say about them being little enough to outrun and within reach! You can control the activities, you can dictate the cost, you can change plans without notifying anyone, you can reach each one of them when you need too. As they age...you can't control all their activities, you can't dictate every cost, you can't change plans on a moments notice because someone else already has an agenda.
As teens and young adults I hardly have any control over those things. Matter of fact, many of those things are dragging me around! Youth events, game night, Bible studies, small groups, school functions, sports, work, etc, etc. From time to time I can actually get on my feet again, but most days I am being dragged!
I'm slowly learning how to cope with this feeling of no control. How do I cope? I get to control my response to being out of control. Meaning...I can chose to be angry, frustrated, and overwhelmed OR I can enjoy the moment, give it to God, and deal with what I can manage.
My kids need to see me have joy in my chaos. I'm not always there but I hope they see mom improving year after year. They need to know it is an honor and a blessing to be their mom! If I need to give myself to something, I am glad God let it be these precious children.
Our days don't always run smooth, my week rarely plays out the way I plan it, somebody is eye rolling and throwing off some deep sigh, BUT the years are flying by faster and faster and faster!
I'm going to pray and hope I remember to choose to look through God's eyes at my busy life. Because if I look through my eyes, I am NOT achieving or accomplishing all I want or need to do.
BUT, if I look through God's eyes...ALL is well with my soul!
He holds the key to their success, happiness, and blessings. I'm just a guide that can lead them well or throw them off track!
I PRAY that I will lead well!