Thursday, December 17, 2009

I Want, What I Want, When I Want It

Are you shaping your teen or controlling your teen?

Do you know your teen’s wants?

Or does your teen know your wants?

Are you influencing your teen or exasperating them?

Have you ever seen these from your teen?

Rolling eyes


Flat face, no communication

You done yet

These are normal for all teens. Just like having infants, they will cry when they are hungry or tired. All toddlers go through a destruction stage. And all teens go through the 'push back' phase!

So how do we get through this as a parent without destroying our relationship with our teen?

Keep on working WITH your teens. I love the comment I heard on the radio broadcast....who do angry teens go to? Their friends! They are not going to come back to you. IF I wait on them to come back to me when they are ready to talk or work through a problem, it WON'T happen. As the parent, I can't be the one to sit back and let this work itself out. It won't. Life goes on everyone will keep on moving past the issue until the next one and the pile of unresolved conflict will just stack up.

What would happen if I had a marriage and I just give up because my spouse makes me crazy or angry? Where would my marriage be?

If I have an infant that cries because he is hungry, tired, or just cranky, what would happen if I never stepped in to help?

If I have a teen that is angry or hurt and I leave them alone to come to me when they are ready for help, when will they come back? Often...never! They go straight to their friends. We have yet to have an angry teen come to us and ask for help. It takes Barry and I going to them!

IF we leave it up to them, we would have NO relationship! We have people ask us how do you have such a good relationship with your kids?

We keep working on it. We ARE NOT perfect parents! BUT we DON'T give up easily!

We see our role as a God given one. And that doesn't mean we can quit when we are tired, hurt, confused, or scared. We look to the Lord....and go at it again! Love is persistent!

If you are a parent of a teen or a child (because they will be a teen one day). You need to make the time to listen to the radio broadcast below. The link below is Day 2 of the radio broadcast. Go back and listen to Day 1 and then listen to this one. You will feel encouraged, empowered!
I find with our teens I go through stages of uncertainty and WHY are they pushing back. I need to remember it is how God designed them. Now, the real work is WHAT am I going to do with this child God has given to me?

Teens will go through a stage of pushing back!
Teens will get angry!
The question is.....what WILL 'YOU' do?
The FamilyLife link will take you to the radio broadcast to listen at your convenience.

FamilyLife Today -

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The above book and audio might be a great resource for you or others you know. I have posted a link to the right of my blog called Angry Teens. Just click on the link to read more about this resource.

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