Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Refilling, Recapturing, Regrouping

What a day of grumbling we have had in our household. Apparently, mom has left her post and allowed a few too many moments of them speaking their mind. No worries...mom sees the issue and is filling her cup.

There are a few parenting book standards that stay by our bed to be grabbed at a moment's notice. Not that we get to read it immediately but we can grab it and it is there when that moment presents itself. Like tonight at 1:00 a.m.!

Parenting is an exhausting task that cannot go without being filled, encouraged, and regrouped from time to time. I have learned over the years not to see these moments as failures but to see I just need to gas up again, refill the ammo, or regain right perspective. I need to see the goal and understand the battle I am in and recharge for the long haul. There was not a reason to read the entire book this evening I just needed a burst of encouragement. You know the kind that helps you get your head back in the game so you have right footing in dealing with kids that like to throw mom off track from her task of the day.

My task today was to pour into their education so they can have a happy prosperous filled life. (They desire this too, right?) Apparently their task of the day was too complain, bicker, complain to mom, tattle tale (about 20 times), avoid the chores and more importantly question why we are doing school, leave messes, and beg for video games. (I think we are detoxing from the holiday of freedom to do, be and play what you want at a moment's notice.)

So what book did I grab? "Parenting Today's Adolescents" by Dennis & Barbara Rainey. I needed to read this paragraph this evening...

"You will get tired. You will experience pain. The ones we are sacrificing for - our children - will sometimes say and do things that hurt us deeply. They do that because they are still children, and "Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child" (Prov. 22:15)

My well wishes of a good education and dreams of a well run home school day were NOT on their agenda. I am learning to yield what I think is a right and see that my teaching moments are not conveniently wrapped up in a book, a video textbook, or an educational internet site. My teaching moments are happening 'during life'!

In the heat of a tattle tale saga mom can teach how to honor your sibling.

In the battle of avoiding ones work or doing a half done job are lessons of living life different from others. Living a life that says what I do matters because I serve a risen King (appeal to the heart, teach to the heart, they can't argue)!

In the disgust of someone else we learn we can't control someone else but we can control our response. They are learning they have control. Circumstances do NOT determine my children's joy. As a mom I will parent this over and over and over again. They and I will have a lifetime of learning this lesson, beginning with a mom on a day of grumbling and complaining. I wanted to cave(join their complaints), I nearly caved (lost my joy), but God is good and we survived the day (perserverance).

Tonight I REFILL my cup.

I RECAPTURE the goal in sight.

And to help with being a pro-active parent vs. a reactive parent, I REGROUP!

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